BP3 - 25 MEI 2009 : ISNIN DI UMMC

After the usual necessities, insisted that I could drive the Naza to send Durrah to Sekolah Ugama while Suami sent Aiman to the other side of town.
He would come back to pick me up & send me to UMMC. Both of us did not think that *the public parking in UMMC would be a friendly place for someone who couldn't blink one of her eyes!

(*I've been using the parking place regularly since late 2007 after T.Mak's stroke. My bad driving, the big Naza & the very bad design of the building-traffic flow, etc had contributed to all sorts of scratches, dents, etc that could be found on the Naza. Glad to say that the place had improved!)

Oopps... as I reversed the Naza out of the gate, realized that glass window on the driver's side MUST NOT be wound down!
The morning breeze that normally feel so good on the face... oooh.. oohh, could not have that today! It dried up the right eye faster. Had to remember touching the upper eyelid, so that it would be forced to close, ie to mimick blinking.
OK, the driving within a 3km distance could be done... but NOT so easy.

Passed to Durrah the *tasbih. She normally choose whatever she wants to recite. However, this time specifically asked her to do "ALHAMDULILLAH". Told her that she (& all of us) still have lots to thank ALLAH swt for, eg I can still move around & drive her to school :)

(*tasbih brought back by your latest umrah Saadah !)

Driving back towards home, my mind was trying to focus on THINGS TO DO / ACCOMPLISH. Not just today, but for the whole week.

I know that I am entering the next phase of my Bell's Palsy: figuring out details, treatments, etc

Had a quick breakfast because I had to take my 6 x 5mg of prednisolone (30mg total).

I looked through my UMMC card & referral letters:

25/5 (Monday): Start of physiotherapy

26/5 (Tuesday): Neuromedical

27/5 (Wednesday): Introduction to Rehabilatation Therapy

28/5 (Thursday): Neuro Lab (to check extend of damage to the nerve)

29/5 (Friday): Ear & Throat

It will be a long week!

Suami dropped me at the main entrance of UMMC & we were both unsure the kind of arrangements of when I should be picked up, etc. One thing for certain he would be picking up Durrah.

I walked over to the other building where the Physiotherapy Unit is located. Registered myself with the referral letter, etc & then plodded myself on the seat to wait.

While waiting, sent out more sms: research collaborators, mantan "auping group", senior grad students (including Ain), etc that I felt should hear the news straight from me.

I also stumbled into a friend from the department who was having an excruciating back problem after a fall, Kak Erah's friend who suddenly had a bad attack on her knee joint & Ain's friend who had a procedure for her Carpal Tunnel Sysndrome (CTS). So, we had our chats in between waitings.

The girl who was assigned to me went through the referral forms which had 'ticks' on what was supposed to be done on me. *She & her superior felt that the information in the form was not exactly correct & so they decided differently on some matters.

(*They looked familiar. I think I had socialized with them before in the past, during visits with T.Mak to the place due to problems she had with her arm-shoulder area. ProfTS had referred her to the place.)

Next she gave me a piece of paper with info on both sides of it:

Front Page: SENAMAN UNTUK OTOT-OTOT MUKA with 12 facial expressions like mengangkat kening, mengerut kening, tutup mata, buka mata, mengerut hidung, senyum, senyum lebar, mengerut dagu, kelihatan sedih, buka mulut, tutup mulut, tiup.

You think kacang, huh?

Well, I couldn't do any of it well... as in the right side of the face didn't want to do anything!

At The Back Of The Page: 5 were listed under the topic ANDA DINASIHATKAN SUPAYA:

1) Jangan baring pada bahagian muka yang terlibat.

*Practising it already :)

2) Lakukan senaman setiap 1 jam seperti yang diajar oleh fisioterapi.

*1 hour daily? Wah, tak buat aktiviti lain macam ni!

3) Sentiasa menutup masa semasa tidur (dengan gauze) & memakai cermin mata semasa keluar dari rumah.

*This is not easy! I would start out doing that, but... my hands would take off whatever was being put on the right eye!

4) Gunakan straw semasa minum.

*Practising that already... if not whatever I drink will meleleh merata-rata.

5) Urut muka ke arah atas & ke telinga, cth boleh gunakan ais semasa mengurut.

*I added the last part about using ice after the little discussion we had

Then the electrotherapy started after she prepared 3 sites for attachments:

1) Just above the forehead

2) In the area below the cheekbone

3) Near the area of the lower jaw

A 15 minutes worth of pulses (I was asked about the limit that I could stand) were given in accordance to the sites set up.

Once done, I sms to a few of my grad students asking them to drive in one car to UMMC main entrance for our exchange of documents :)
As I was walking to the main entrance, stumbled into June with her father. We exchanged news & I thought to myself, "Who else would I be meeting today?"

11.40am: Mui Koon drove by with Joan & Amzari as passengers.
Joan said, "Dr........." in a hopeless kind of tone through the wound down window. http://foolishreport.blogspot.com/2009/05/she-optimist.html
To make matters worse, it so happened I just put in drops of artificial tears into the eye. I was not too good at it, yet, so it did make me look as if I was crying! I tried to tell them that I was not crying, but I didn't think they believe me.

Then, I went back in & stood in line to get my medication but to just realize that I left the prescriptions somewhere :(

Since it was still early, I went up to the level 1 counter for the appointment tomorrow & asked whether I could request to be seen by *Prof KJG. The girl at the counter told me that I would just have to see whoever was available tomorrow, unless of course Prof KJG had agreed to see me.

(*Prof KJG has been seeing Tok Mak both in UMMC & UMSC since we brought her after the stroke, referred by Prof I. We like him. He also had taken time to see Sieaw Ching, one of my former undergraduate students, with her elbow problem :) )

With all the walkings I had to do... Ich haber hunger (one of the few sentences I could still remember from my German 101 in CSUC, i.e. I'm hungry!)
So, to the foodcourt at level 1. Since the meehoon soup was not ready, yet, instead took away soft tofu, rojak, yong tau foo & cendol.

Rushed to the main entrance again to be picked up by Suami. Sempat lagi beli roti-roti Aiman's favourite for breakfast tomorrow (of course butter scotch & chocolate with raisins)!
As I sat in the car, I saw the prescriptions near the ADY's dashboard!

At home, we quickly ate lunch & Durrah asked, "Muka Mama tak boleh bedah ke?" I think she meant plastic surgery. Poor girl!

I thought about the antibiotics prescription for the ear. It was already Monday afternoon & if my problem was related to something in my ear... then, certainly I was not attending to it!

So, I told Suami... he would have to drop me back at UMMC main entrance after dropping off Durrah at her school gate!

The line to handing in the prescription was short. Got the antibiotics for the ear & put it into the ear immediately. Oh yes, while waiting I also stumbled into TN (a former librarian & 'auping'). Again, more exchange of news!

sms a few friends who're quite insistent about meeting me ASAP. Told them to meet me in AMCORP!

Of course Suami felt that it was too many hours that I needed to kill before he could pick me up after picking up Durrah at 6:30pm. I assured him that I would be fine with one of these girls & I was not in the mood of repeating instructions to taxi drivers on how to get back to our home from UMMC. Easier to say "AMCORP" :)

None of them could actually meet me, it was too late in the day.

So, instead, I had a shopping therapy to wind down from my first day experience of this phase of my life as a person having Bell's Palsy!

I cruised & shopped from the ground level, only -- 1 blouse & 2 long skirts for Durrah (from 2 different shops), some stock up stuff from the pharmacy, tall mugs that Amzar could use in his dorm life... & finally, sat myself at Secret Recipe for a piece of carrot cake + a smoothie suggested by the waitress while waiting to go home!

Alhamdulillah, one down & four to go!

That night I asked Joan to set a blog site for me. I had stumbled into hers sometime back & so I know she could set one up for me. Joan obliged :)

Having a blog would be good therapy for myself & I would like the experience to be recorded. Ini semua training audit, kut? Most importantly, I figured that there would be many more days to go, each one bringing different experince.

Maybe my experience could be benefitial to others. When life gives lemon, make lemonade!

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QUE SERA... SERA of Doris Day:

When I was just a little girl

I asked my mother: What will I be? Will I be pretty? Will I be rich?

Here's what she said to me: Que sera, sera. Whatever will be, will be. The future's not ours to see. Que sera, sera. What will be, will be.

When I grew up and fell in love, I asked my sweetheart: What lies ahead? Will we have rainbows day after day?

Here's what my sweetheart said: Que sera, sera. Whatever will be, will be. The future's not ours to see. Que sera, sera. What will be, will be.

Now I have children of my own. They ask their mother: What will I be? Will I be handsome? Will I be rich?

I tell them tenderly: Que sera, sera. Whatever will be, will be. The future's not ours to see. Que sera, sera. What will be, will be. Que sera, sera.

BP2 - 24 MEI 2009 : AHAD MALAM

Well... it's the time of day that most people started thinking back about their work, ie Sunday night (end tail of the weekend, before working back on Monday....)

I remembered about the observation session I was supposed to do at a private Higher Education Provider in SJ. Obviously, I would not be going & so arrangements have to be made. So, 1st sms out with regards to work, to the officer who was the contact point:

Salam Afizah. Please pass this message to DrRozi

{My apologies, I won't be able to observe Dr Deepa's class tomorrow. I've been given mc for a few days. An unfortunate event happened over the weekend. I woke up with total paralysis of right side of my face & I've been diagnosed as having Bell's Palsy (Thank God, not due to stroke). However, my speech is affected & I 'constantly' need to put in artificial tear to my right eye so that it doesn't dry up. I'm scheduled for my 1st session of facial retraining-physiotherapy tomorrow @UMMC. Don't worry over me, I'll bounce back (God's willing). Hope I'll be fine enough by the next session :p My regards to Dr Deepa & Dr Jasbir}

So, that was settled.

Then, it was answering sms from an international student who wanted to make an appointment to see me about her classes next semester & a graduating student asking for permission to call me to discuss about future alternatives. What a coincidence, they are both Fatimah! I told them both what had happened.

OK, it was not so early but not so late... better go to sleep. I would start the next phase of trying to handle the Bell's Palsy with treatments / tests / etc @ UMMC. Que sera... Que sera...

Of course, sleep time bring anxiety internally... hassle of getting the eye ready to sleep. Of course, BP went up :(

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BP2 - 24 MEI 2009 : AHAD SIANG

I woke up panicking... felt like the eyepad was off & the right eye felt *dried.
Oh My God.. Oh My God..
Quickly reached out for the artificial tear & squirted few drops into the eye.

(*I have high hopes, motivated with full recovery stories told to me, eg about husbands of friends... & even RS the communicator, that my speech would get back to normal sooner or later.
But the eye... an infection, a scratched cornea, etc... that would be another story!
To be honest, I've always been very protective & concerned over my eyes. )

Prepared for solat subuh, though of course spent more than a few minutes trying to make faces in front of the mirror in the bathroom!
Nope, no changes.

Suami was already out at the Old Town market. Looked in at the kids & they were back at sleep. Got myself ready for a walk at the nearby park, bringing along my handphone.
Left a note on the wall to Suami about where I was going.

As I was walking towards the park, I kept humming Louis Armstrong's WHAT A WONDERFUL WORLD:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vnRqYMTpXHc

I see trees of green, red roses too

I see them bloom for me and you

And I think to myself, what a wonderful world

I see skies of blue and clouds of white

The bright blessed day, the dark sacred night

And I think to myself, what a wonderful world

The colours of the rainbow, so pretty in the sky

Are also on the faces of people going by

I see friends shakin' hands, sayin' "How do you do?"

They're really saying "I love you"

I hear babies cryin', I watch them grow

They'll learn much more than I'll ever know

And I think to myself, what a wonderful world

Yes, I think to myself, what a wonderful world

Oh yeah!

======================

SUBHANALLAH...

WALHAMDULILLAH...

WALA ILA HAILLAH WALLAH HU AKBAR

======================

I walked 1 round, did 2 rounds of walking on the reflexology stone path... then sat down on a bench.
I knew, I had to start sms-ing the others about my condition. Aaah....

1st sms: Apologizing to a family friend for our absentism from the wedding reception & to tell him that Saadah actually *kirim hadiah. I mentioned "Manusia rancang, ALLAH swt tentukan". Saadah got a cc of the sms.

(*I remembered sms-ing him last week to confirm attendance & rushing off to MJ at Mega Mall after Maghrib, to buy the wedding gift from the family & also buying one on Saadah's behalf.)

2nd sms & on were to siblings, each starting with "FYI:..." & the content was similar to the one I sent to Khalil.
I ended each sms with : "TQ atas doa muga pulih sepenuhnya ASAP, InsyaAllah. Pagi kami hantar Amzar ke Matrikulasi UIA"
That last sentence will stop them rushing to see me in the morning & a few hours into the afternoon.
That will give me sometime... I don't really know for what. BUT I know that I need the time.

Then to a few close friends (Manis, Rohaida, Nina, Jie, Brunei... even to MR). I had to of course started answering all sorts of questions... snippets of my answers (throughout the day, actually...):

- Me... yang ada course Diseases of the Nervous System ;p So, kurang risau X tentu pasal, but I also know it when doctor makes empty promises. Anyway, nak kena.. kena juga. Redha aja dugaan...

- Dulu masa @US, telinga kanan juga kena attack by virus. Yang tu jenis kena vertigo.. semua berpusing. Terbaring dekat sebulan. Ini I can still move around.

- So, now I have medical reason, pula!

- InsyaAllah, adalah hikmahnya. For one, now I have a medical reason to turn down... macam dah nak kena... Tok Mak @ Bt20

- Lepas cuti sabatikal, jawatan 'suruh' terima: Pegang balik KA (he.. he..), TPs.. Priority Tok Mak; masa Tok Ayah tak ada...

- Yes, it's serious. Drink with straw, me-family have to adjust to my speech.

- Started treatment quick + on right track. Full recovery varies; a few weeks, months to years!

- In KL, viral flu causing havoc.. macam-macam jenis, some had it bad. With me sebuk... so X ambil kisah sakit telinga 2 days ago. Thought part of body-joint aches due to viral flu. Was lethargic for about 2-3 weeks.

- I'm going about as usual, but can't speak well. OKlahtu :p

- Check on YOU TUBE, lots of examples

By then Suami had joined me at the park & did his rounds. Informed him that I told people already...

Went back & had lontong, etc that Suami bought :)
Kids up & about to send the brother.

000000000000000000000000000000000000

http://picasaweb.google.com/ds.zein/AMZARASISUIA#5339401731540202178

000000000000000000000000000000000000

Helped Amzar with final packing. He insisted that he only wanted to bring 2 bags (one was the bag he bought from trip to Bandung with Suami last week) & NO BANTAL (even though it's on the check list) .
"Mama... Amzar dah berpengalaman duduk asrama. Dekat ASiS tu bantal penuh satu stor. Orang wakaf saja..."

10:30 am : Suami made sure photos taken, etc & we left to send our first born to his post-school life.

WOW... there were signs which started on the main road even from the junction near our housing area... cars double parked lining the roads in front of the main campus... the happy faces of parents, families & of course "the grown ups".

Back to the Bell's Palsy patient & her family:
We stayed away from sitting under the canopy with the group of parents. I was not ready to make little conversation & having those socializing with me working hard to understand what I was saying.

We stayed busy reading Sunday papers at a marble bench near by.
My group of graduate students have stumbled into the e mail I sent them last night, got first response from Mieza:
Salam.. Dr, sorry to hear about your condition.. Semoga Dr tabah hadapi dugaan daripadaNya. Hope you'll soon be feeling fine & enjoying better health again. Take good care & rest =)

Received others with similar content, mostly urging me to remain strong. Some even relaying messages from their mothers. Soke Chee's had extra information:
Dr, I had heard about medical condition similar to yours in my hometown cured by acupuncture in TS Hospital. Would like to share this information with you :)

All this time, Suami of course was busy snapping away pictures... even dari celah grill. Adoi, Baba...

I told Amzar, "If people give you the looks... just say, I'm the eldest & so this is a happy day for my father!"
I was happy & pround to see that Amzar was cool about the whole thing, he thought it was funny too & he was NOT embarassed by his Baba's actions!
Kasi chance lah kat Baba :)

I told Aiman, "Baba will do the same thing when it's your time. Just say: I'm his baby boy & so this is my father's happy day!"

Then I told Durrah, "Baba will also do the same when it's your time. Tell people: I'm his youngest & so my father is very happy today!"

The whole registration & *opening of bank account went quite quickly! Congrats Matrikulasi UIA!

(*Wanted to give him the rest of his hadiah for the 8A1 & 1A2 he got. He already took some to shop a couple of times...)

Then off to to the dorm... 4th floor & mengenjot memanjat tangga! Adoi!

All the 2 persons per room in 'no. 401 apartment' were taken.
Left was one room with 2 double deckers & another was a makeshift room with 1 single bed.
After the whole family tested the beds (of course with Baba taking more pictures), Amzar agreed it should be the latter.
THE funny thing was: NO BANTAL! Hah!

We decided to go for lunch at a place where we could get for Amzar a pillow & some clothes hangers & antibiotics for the ear plus more artificial tear for me. The fluid for the eye that I was using had preservatives & it was causing allergic reaction.
So, here we go to... where else but to AMCORP!

Aiman kept repeating with big smiles on his face of his amazement that Amzar's place was SO close to everything, even to their Samad School.
I thought, "So... he was affected by the idea that Amzar would be gone again..."

Anyway, celebratory lunch at KR, only got the artificial tear off the counter & not the antibiotics since the pharmacist had just gone out for lunch.
As for Amzar, he instead got for himself a Giordano t-shirt on sale.
Yes, back HOME to get the pillow!
Since Amzar needed to go back only at 5pm, he snoozed at the brown sofa, solat zohor, then continued on at the striped sofa.
Penatnya pelajar matrikulasi... baru pendaftaran!

After Asr, only me & Suami sent him off. We dropped him off in front of the gate. Aiman & Durrah were too tired & furthermore they had sent him all the way to his room.
So, one tanggungjawab for the weekend was settled, Alhamdulillah.

Next, back to Amcorp as I really wanted to get the antibiotics for the ear.
Sorry, they don't have it. I guess, I would just get it from UMMC on Monday during my first physiotherapy session.

When we arrived home... Refering to TAF parked in front of the house, Suami said, "Your sister is here..."
Kak Ijah was sitting facing towards the door & I thought she had this unsure with a tinge of sadness look on her face & Abang Fozi was sitting at the sofa.

So, stories were exchanged at the round table which had heard so many happy-sad-gossipy-you name it stories since 1995 when it joined the GI household. If only the table could talk...

Rahil, Zaidi & Ayrah later joined. Even the 1 year old plus cucu Ayrah looked anxiously at her WanZ & (we thought) she said, "Napanya?"

Rahil suggested that I just pulled the end part of my the right side of my lips when I wanted to pronounced anything with "B" & "P" which I had most troubled with. It helped!

They left since it was close to Maghrib.

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BP1 - 23 MEI 2009 : SABTU MALAM (AHAD) DI RUMAH

We had a family group Yasin reading & a doa session lead by Suami: for Amzar yang nak masuk ke dunia baru, for all family members, especially those who are currently not in the pink of health -- Mama, Nenek, Tok Mak & Pak Long.

Also each was given a chance to "verbalize whatever" that (s)he wanted to share, starting with Suami. Next Amzar, Aiman & Durrah.
Last was me. I used mine to thank everyone & to focus on Amzar's next step.
One thing at a time :)

During dinner, I called up Dr Mona & asked whether her clinic is still opened. Nak juga satu lagi opinion... Hoping against hope?

Dr Mona said exactly the same thing.
However, being an honorary *family physician-friend she was being extra nice!
She said, "I've seen so many cases like this. You will FULLY recover."
I thought to myself, "Hmmm... you're promising me more than you should, Mona."

(*Well... she did see EVERYONE, dari Parni, Bibik Khasanah, Rochanah, Tini hinggalah ke Fitri mata kena gigit lebah, Fitrah, of course GI family, VA family, Kak Erah, Tok Mak & EVEN Mak Aji Kalsum (for her lutut) + Lily (for her high BP) all the way from Tual, Pulau Kei, Sulawesi, Indonesia (June 2007, when they came over for wedding of Adlan-Sakina)!

Other things she commented was she thought the dosage for the prednisolone should have been slightly more.

Also my BP reading on her machine was much lower than what was shown by the machine at home. Maybe mine should be sent for calibration! The reading on mine was rather scary... but under the circumstances, "taklah mengejutkan..."

Oh yes, she mentioned that some Chinese thought Bell's Palsy has something to do with angin! There are 'stories' of individuals getting Bell's Palsy after sleeping on the concerned side of the face during long bus rides at night with open windows!

After the visit to Dr. Mona, I sat at the laptop... sent an e mail to my group of students about change of plans for Monday. I thought of having a group meeting with each having assignment to do.
I am sure they'll be busy "googling" Bell's Palsy to get more information about my problem.

The rest of the night for me was also spent "googling" till way past 2 am.
Lots of information & printed a few.
Also stumbled into some interesting "you tube recordings". I noticed that they are all rather jovial about their situations :)

I was tired & I couldn't actually digest the info anymore... same thing but worded differently in different sites. An easy one to follow: http://kidshealth.org/teen/diseases_conditions/brain_nervous/bells_palsy.html#

Basically:
- No one really know why it happened, but mostly related to post-viral infection.
- Inflammation needed to be treated with steroid ASAP (within 72 hours)
- Speed of recovery varies -- 2 weeks to months & years
- Scope of recovery varies -- the normal statistics show 95% with complete recovery while 5% don't
- Factors which may facilitate recovery -- facial re-training, physiotherapy, massage & acupuncture. Vitamin B6, B12 & Zinc have also been mentioned.

Wallahu'alam!

Deep down I think I didn't feel too comfortable with the idea of sleeping at night. Unspoken fear of what had happened the last time I slept?

Of course, I had sleep. I had to be up & about to send off Amzar later in the morning. He decided that he wanted to go at 10:30am, although registration started at 8:00am.

Well, clumsily going through the hassles of putting in a lot of artificial tear fluid, putting the pad & *a long selindang enjut-enjut to tie up the pad so that the top eyelid would not slowly open up or me taking it off, without realizing it. In the late afternoon siesta I had earlier, the pad was already slightly flapping off when I woke up.

(*I've had the selindang for many years, but I've never wear it. I am just not a selindang panjang person. However, I still kept it because Saadah got me the selindang during her Haj. TQ Saadah :)

It was way past 2:30am when I ended up sleeping. That was after I kept playing Al-Mulk & at least 2 rounds of Ar-Rahman using my *phone.

(*Sahabat Kamila, I copied the Quran recitation from the KA laptop you passed down to me! I don't know who downloaded it to the laptop in the first place)

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YASIN (Surah 36: 82-83):

إِنَّمَا أَمْرُهُ إِذَا أَرَادَ شَيْئًا أَنْ يَقُولَ لَهُ كُنْ فَيَكُونُ (36:82

فَسُبْحَانَ الَّذِي بِيَدِهِ مَلَكُوتُ كُلِّ شَيْءٍ وَإِلَيْهِ تُرْجَعُونَ (36:83

Verily, when He intends a thing, His Command is, "be", and it is!

So glory to Him in Whose hands is the dominion of all things: and to Him will ye be all brought back.

"Sesungguhnya perintah-Nya apabila Dia menghendaki sesuatu hanyalah berkata kepadanya: ""Jadilah!"" maka terjadilah ia."

Maka Maha Suci (Allah) yang di tangan-Nya kekuasaan atas segala sesuatu dan kepada-Nya lah kamu dikembalikan.

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BP1 - 23 MEI 2009 : SABTU SENJA DI RUMAH

6.27pm : The phone beside my pillow rang. It was Kak Ijah. She asked me, "Kamu *pengsan ke ni?"
(That's how we refer to the state when anyone of us is taking a real rest & most likely sleeping due to penat teramat).
I said something like, "Ye..."
She continued on quickly about her sms-ing Abang Ripin the details of the ole-ole & then she let me off.

It was good she called. Solat asar.

6:57pm: Went downstairs to get some drinks, etc, the phone rang... Abang Ripin from Tual, Pulau Kei, Sulawesi, Indonesia!
Another history in the making.
Last year it was the Kak Ijah (cucu)-Abang Fauzi (cucu menantu) duo reaching the land after 3 generations... after Atuk Laki left the land for Mekah at the age of 13 (?).
Tok Ayah (anak) never set foot on the land.
Now, here's Abang Ripin, a cucu menantu!
He was so excited & the line was not too clear.. he didn't notice my slurness.
He passed the phone to Kak Ratna & I managed to say something like, "ABANG RIPIN yang dibawa angin ke sana, ya?".
She replied in the tone that I thought also reflected, "Yeah... this is really weird, I know what you mean. But hey... we're ecstatic with whoever from the clan that ALLAH sent to us"
I was partly panicking because I seriously did not think I could be making any sense over the phone.
The line went dead in the middle of her sentence.
Phew, Alhamdulillah. I was not ready to have my Bell's Palsy news travelled all the way to Sulawesi!

Suami & kids fussed over my face. I think, hoping that "Mama's face event is just one of those things that would go away after Mama has had her sleep rest". Sorry, not this one.
To perk the situation, I was asking for the camera, etc... & how I wanted my current face to be recorded. Told them that the E&T lady doctor suggested for photos to be taken so that I could monitor progress.
I was making funny faces, but I know they did not think they were laughable.
Of course, I gave the slowly worded directive, "DON'T MMS anyone those pictures. Not yet."

Of course, in the back of my mind was, "How long do I want to keep this secret from the family -- both PP & Temerloh clans? I've got to tell them, sooner or later... Who to tell first & when?"
Deliberated a bit on my unreadiness state of mind, Amzar's preparation for UIA, Tok Mak's condition, etc etc etc... then made up my mind.

7:06pm : Sent out the Bell's Palsy news for the first time to a warga Pondok Putih (PP): an sms to Khalil, who's now doing umrah. He left the last weekend.

"Salam. Khalil, nak minta tolong doa supaya fungsi gentian saraf kanan no. 7 ke muka MakZ sembuh. FYI: Sabtu pagi hilang kawalan otot muka sebelah kanan: X boleh turunkan kelopak mata kanan, tidur kena pakai eye pad; nak bercakap / makan / minum payah & mulut herot. Tests (ECG, x-ray, CT scan) @ UMMC showed Alhamdulillah X strok, tapi kes ini namanya Bell's Palsy. Rawatan = ubat2 & facial physiotherapy. TQ atas doa muga pulih sepenuhnya dalam kadar segera, InsyaAllah"

7:23pm : Sent out the same sms to a warga Temerloh, (Dr.) Lina with an additional sentence:
Advice on matter?

Lina's reply, "Selalunya post viral. InsyaAllah prognosis good. Kena completekan course prednisolone."

*************************************************

BP1 - 23 MEI 2009 : SABTU PETANG DI RUMAH

Quickly ate lunch & took a shower.

Came to realize that in closing my eyes, especially the right eye... it was not just the upper lid that needed to come down BUT the lower lid also had to slightly come up a bit for a complete closure.

So, just holding the upper lid down with a finger would not stop the water & the shampoo from entering the right eye!

Solat zohor & at the sejadah... taking time to reflect of the day's events .

In my mind, this Quranic verse which is first mentioned as verse 13 from Surah Ar-Rahman (Surah 55) was *repeated:

فَبِأَيِّ آلَاء رَبِّكُمَا تُكَذِّبَانِ

Then which of the favours of your Lord will you deny?

(*This verse is the most often repeated in the Surah, ie 31 times!
Kept flashing in my mind was a time during our Haj in 2003.. we were walking back from Masjid Nabawi, Madinah back to the hotel & there was this Malay boy walking in front of us with a group of elederly men & he was reciting Surah Ar-Rahman... following a recording that was played by one of the shops on the street !
I also remembered humming a line from Louis Armstrong... "what a wonderful world" to myself..)

So, took out the Quran & read the whole Surah Ar-Rahman

Then, used the eye pad for the first time... had Amzar helped stick the tapes on.

The one-eyed lady pirate needed a rest... zzzzzz.... !!!!

************************************************************************
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bsk58tjsuaM&feature=related

AR-RAHMAN (THE BENEFICENT, THE MERCY GIVING)
Total Verses: 78 Revealed At: MAKKA, YUSUF ALI:

055.001: (Allah) Most Gracious!
055.002: It is He Who has taught the Qur'an.
055.003: He has created man,
055.004: He has taught him speech (and intelligence).
055.005: The sun and the moon follow courses (exactly) computed;
055.006: And the herbs and the trees - both (alike) prostrate in adoration.
055.007: And the Firmament has He raised high, and He has set up the Balance (of Justice),
055.008: In order that ye may not transgress (due) balance.
055.009: So establish weight with justice and fall not short in the balance.
055.010: It is He Who has spread out the earth for (His) creatures:
055.011: Therein is fruit and date-palms, producing spathes (enclosing dates);
055.012: Also corn, with (its) leaves and stalk for fodder, and sweet-smelling plants.
055.013: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.014: He created man from sounding clay like unto pottery,
055.015: And He created Jinns from fire free of smoke:
055.016: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.017: (He is) Lord of the two Easts and Lord of the two Wests:
055.018: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.019: He has let free the two bodies of flowing water, meeting together:
055.020: Between them is a Barrier which they do not transgress:
055.021: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.022: Out of them come Pearls and Coral:
055.023: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.024: And His are the Ships sailing smoothly through the seas, lofty as mountains:
055.025: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.026: All that is on earth will perish:
055.027: But will abide (for ever) the Face of thy Lord,- full of Majesty, Bounty and Honour.
055.028: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.029: Of Him seeks (its need) every creature in the heavens and on earth: every day in (new) Splendour doth He (shine)!
055.030: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.031: Soon shall We settle your affairs, O both ye worlds!
055.032: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny

055.033: O ye assembly of Jinns and men! If it be ye can pass beyond the zones of the heavens and the earth, pass ye! not without authority shall ye be able to pass!
055.034: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.035: On you will be sent (O ye evil ones twain!) a flame of fire (to burn) and a smoke (to choke): no defence will ye have:
055.036: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.037: When the sky is rent asunder, and it becomes red like ointment:
055.038:Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.039: On that Day no question will be asked of man or Jinn as to his sin.
055.040: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.041: (For) the sinners will be known by their marks: and they will be seized by their forelocks and their feet.
055.042: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.043: This is the Hell which the Sinners deny
055.044: In its midst and in the midst of boiling hot water will they wander round!
055.045: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.046: But for such as fear the time when they will stand before (the Judgment Seat of) their Lord, there will be two Gardens
055.047: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.048: Containing all kinds (of trees and delights);
055.049: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.050: In them (each) will be two Springs flowing (free);
055.051: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.052: In them will be Fruits of every kind, two and two.
055.053: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.054: They will recline on Carpets, whose inner linings will be of rich brocade: the Fruit of the Gardens will be near (and easy of reach).
055.055: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.056: In them will be (Maidens), chaste, restraining their glances, whom no man or Jinn before them has touched;
055.057: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.058: Like unto Rubies and coral.
055.059: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.060: Is there any Reward for Good - other than Good?
055.061: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.062: And besides these two, there are two other Gardens,
055.063: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.064: Dark-green in colour (from plentiful watering).
055.065: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.066: In them (each) will be two Springs pouring forth water in continuous abundance:
055.067: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.068: In them will be Fruits, and dates and pomegranates:
055.069: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.070: In them will be fair (Companions), good, beautiful;
055.071: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.072: Companions restrained (as to their glances), in (goodly) pavilions.
055.073: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.074: Whom no man or Jinn before them has touched;
055.075 : Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.076: Reclining on green Cushions and rich Carpets of beauty.
055.077: Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

055.078: Blessed be the name of thy Lord, full of Majesty, Bounty and Honour.



*************************************************

BP1 - 23 MEI 2009 : SABTU PAGI-TENGAHARI DI UMMC

We didn't talk much on way to UMMC. Too many scary thoughts running amok in the mind.

When we arrived at *TRAUMA , I went straight to register while Suami went to park the car. The nurse at 1st station took my BP. It was high, though I took my medication before we left.
Tapi sebenarnya TAK lah mengejutkan :)

(*I'm glad original name of DATARAN Trauma was changed to what it is now sahabat FND! My point: DATARAN will remind people of Dataran Merdeka, dataran this & that which are normally associated with lots of joyous occasions, eg perayaan Hari Merdeka, etc but certainly NOT trauma!)

Then, to 2nd station -- reconfirmation of addresses, etc. But couldn't find MYCARD!

I remembered the last time I took it out was when I used it to get the additional 10% discount at mega-sale BS yesterday morning (Friday) in Mega Mall that me & Amzar stumbled into.
We went to Mega Mall after rushing off ole-ole for Tual to Irfan's house in Taman Puncak Jalil. *We were rather late; sampai 10.30am & Pak Ripin was VERY ready to go with Idura & Qaisara at hand to send him off. Had to be at airport by 11 am!

(*Must diverse a bit about why we were late...
Of course the usual sesat jalan.. even though that was the 4th time I went there! The whole time, Amzar kept offering to drive since he passed his driving test the day before.
Back to why we were so late: getting ole-ole ready!
I gift-wrapped some special gifts & had Amzar helped me packed 20 basic sets for our relatives: 1 packet of chocolates+1 packet of rempah Adabi TomYam+1 packet of rempah Adabi Mee Bandung. Apa-apalah...

Before that, straight from sending Durrah to sekolah ugama I went to office although I was on leave...
Kononnya sekejap to pick up laptop & stuff, but of course I ended up leaving 'homework notes' for Amzari, Bibi, Joan, Md Noor, Mieza, Mui Koon, Soke Chee, Zulfa... even Heida, I think!

I must also mention the funny thing that happened on why my stuffs were left in the office overnight!
Normally, laptop will go back home... no matter what.
Late evening Thursday (ie the day before)... I made Bibi, Joan & Md Noor helped carry downstairs my laptop + homework bag for the long weekend (since I was going to take leave on Friday) & to wait for me in front of surau. This was while I got my car from my coordinator's special parking spot on Bukit Bioinformatik.
Guess what I did...?
I rushed off to Sekolah Kebangsaan Alam Shah because it was sending off day for headmistress, Puan Zam Zam. She was transferred in a sudden move to what in my mind was an acknowledgement of her capability!
Students-teachers were crying & I was caught up in the whole scenario, what with the song Ayat-Ayat Cinta (?) blaring on the background & the students were singing along.
Out of the blue, I thought of checking my phone, "How come so many missed calls?"
I called back the last no., which was from Joan.
She blurted, "Did you forget... da.. da.. da..?"
Aiyyaa... I felt so bad, because it was already so late... & they were dengan setianya menunggu in front of the surau... they had to catch their buses, some more!
So, told them to send everything up to the room!
Couldn't imagine having to join the traffic towards office... it was all the way in front of the school!
Of course, I could imagine them laughing their heads off & I didn't blame them :)
I would to if my 'supervisor ala-ala ber-Q' did the same thing.
I'm sure they couldn't wait till the next day to share the hilarious incident to the rest of the group. Even I couldn't help smiling!

More of this at this link
http://foolishreport.blogspot.com/2009/05/tale-of-forgetful-supervisor-and-her.html)

Well, back to UMMC's 2nd station at the emergency, luckily the guy readily accept my driving license. A fleeting thought, "Hidup ke lagi my driving license?" Hidup lagi rupanya.
Of course, found MY CARD after everything had settled.
Asked to go to the waiting area for consultation session. Was relieved to see that no one I knew was there.

I didn't think I wait long before my name was called out.
1st doctor, an elderly lady, did background history, manual checks, 3 vials of blood & all. Basically, she thought it was Bell's Palsy but she got the nerve wrong.
Slowly I said, "You mean 7th nerve, right?"
"Hmmm... Remember Prof TJ Voneida (http://www.brainviews.com/ciFiles/tedpic.jpg)," I told myself.
Prof. Voneida was the Head of Neurobiology Department, NEOUCOM where I did my PhD. He had this infamous multiple facial expressions video tape & lectures on cranial nerves (plus of course Bell's Palsy): Facial Cranial Nerve, 7th nerve... SEVENTH.. SMILE.. SAD, SOB-SOB, etc.. control of facial muscles, facial expression!
Anyway, told me that she couldn't rule out minor stroke due to medical history (BP since *early 2000) & family background (Tok Ayah, Tok Mak, siblings...).
She was optimist, though, because I was still moving around & alert! I wanted to tell her (but it was too great an effort to start explaining matters)... about how Tok Mak could move around even after her stroke that went unnoticed back in 2007, during the latter part of sabbatical!

(*A certain dear person was very sick & I was very disturbed with being constantly trying to figure out what the visitors were thinking as they came to visit her at the ICU.
Took extra Panadol that night but the headaches & stiff neck didn't go away. Remembered telling Suami, "Lain macam aja sakit kepala ni. Kena pi jumpa Dr Selva juga."
After jenazah was taken home (from the hospital) for burial.. that's when I started my medication for BP!)

OK.. OK.. back to the consultation room.
The doctor called someone to discuss my case & I overheard her saying that she suspected I wasn't managing my BP well & that I was probably 'a non-compliance case' so more tests should be given to really rule out minor stroke.
Had this urge to tell her, my compliance about other things might be bad but NOT about my BP. What happened to Tok Mak really shook me up about what could be lost without any warnings! Could have Kak Erah vouched for that :)

Anyway, I thought, "Why not? Let me have the tests. It's not everyday one could walk in to UMMC & get all these tests done within such a short span of time."
I also wanted to make sure that 'stroke' could really be ruled out.

Suami went back to pick up kids.

So, was put in ECG's test room & by 9.56am it was done. Rather quick, I thought.

Next was escorted by a nurse with an elderly lady to the other block to do chest x-ray. The machine in emergency wasn't working? Walked back with the elderly lady to consultation waiting area.
It was 10.23am & since I was told that it would be sometime before the films would be processed, sms Suami that I might as well go for breakfast at the concourse cafetaria.
I didn't feel like eating before we left from home.

Wasn't sure I could handle the usual nasi lemak, etc... so went to the shop on the concourse & bought Tuna sandwich, apple juice & STAR.
Of course, tak selera...

Checked my face at the mirror above the washing hand sink.
Adoi... this is for real, girl... the right upper & lower lips looked thin, the right eye looked big!

Went back to the waiting are but was told that I was to see another doctor. She would come down from the ward ASAP & I probably have to do CT scan.
It was 10.59am, sms Suami about it.
I thought to myself, "Wow... CT scan! This is really getting exciting."

While waiting, sms to Saadah: "FYI: something came up... I sendiri (i.e. not anything to do with Tok Mak). Have been in UMMC whole morning. X selesai lagi. So, there is a big possibility that I won't be going to kenduri. Kut betul X pi, will find ways to pass gifts." That started off a string of sms communications about what I was going through (without telling her the details) & her own health problem.
Dugaan... dugaan...

11.23am : Done with CT scan.
Was not so scary, except for kena tanggal tudung & cermin mata. Ke kalau pakai cermin mata lagi menakutkan sebab tak pakai... semua kabur, i.e. ignorance is bliss :) Barang kemas dah tanggal masa X-ray & I actually have taken off my chains at home...
Head placed in a 'head holder' & arms in a pair of arms holder, i.e. no movement could be made.
The scanning, itself, didn't take long.

By then, suami & kids were at DF having brunch. Kirim hot vanilla & Sultana danish.

Met them at the consultation waiting area.
The kids seemed to be unsure about whole situation. They were checking my face. Never could they imagine that something could possibly be really wrong with their Mama.
Durrah looked slightly worried.
Aiman looked like he felt sorry for me.
Amzar was in a denial sort of attitude, ie "everything's normal & under control". Even brought up other issues, e.g. charge for the vanilla was too much!

They were going to Bangsar, next, to buy stuff for Amzar to bring for his 1 week stay in UIA Section 17 campus & also to see Dr Selva about a thickened painful tissue in Aiman's earlobe.

Finally, got to see the 2nd doctor: a foreigner, young lady but I have faith in her the minute she started asking me questions.
I felt better, too, when another doctor interrupted the session to get HER opinion on his case!
YES, Alhamdulillah!

She did manual checks on me again... gait, etc.
She was talking to herself, too, vocalizing her notes on CNS. My kind of girl :)

She also called her superior to discuss my CT scan results, etc & the outcome was I've to check my ear by an E&T to rule out infection of kayap (herpes zoster virus?).

In between, received a call from Zai, who wanted to kirim $ for pengantin, since she was sure I would be going to kenduri at Putra Jaya.
Told her, "No, because something came up..." She suspected that it must be something important & asked whether it was Tok Mak related. I answered in the negative & told her I couldn't talk anymore.
She already has her own set of dugaan to deal with...

12:27 noon : sms Suami to buy artificial tear, eye pads & tape.

I was asked to make myself comfortable at Bed 8, Observation Ward & wait. Took time to enjoy my cold vanilla & Sultana danish. I was starving.

1:29 noon : A young soft spoken lady doctor checked me. Ear not infected with kayap... no vesicles!

99.9% = Bell's Palsy (ie X tahu apa sebab sebenarnya, but nerve inflammed).
Wrote me a prescription for antibiotic for the pain in the ear that I complained of earlier... just in case & an appointment to see ear specialist on Friday.

Backed with the other young lady doctor.
She discharged me. Wrote note for me to do facial re-training & physiotherapy on Monday morning.
Told her about the observation session I was scheduled to do at a private Higher Education Provider in SJ with MQA.
She said, "I think you should rest, unless of course you think that (session) is VERY important to you."
OK, girl, I got your point.

She gave me mc till Monday. Wrote another note to go to Neuromedical on Tuesday to really rule out the stroke. Also gave prescription of prednisolone (steroid) to reduce inflammation of nerve. Pharmacy at emergency only had prednisolone. Asked to take 6 pills of 5mg each daily after food.

While waiting for Suami, bought a bowl of mee hoon soup for myself & 5 pieces of chicken chops + 2 ikan keli masak lemak kuning cili padi (especially for the boys).

What a long traumatic morning!!
I was just doing whatever needed to be done.
Was relieved when I flopped myself into the car seat.
The antibiotic for the ear can wait...

Alhamdulillah, I could go home !!!

*************************************************
AL-BAQARAH (2: PART OF 286)

لاَ يُكَلِّفُ اللّهُ نَفْسًا إِلاَّ وُسْعَهَا لَهَا مَا كَسَبَتْ وَعَلَيْهَا مَا اكْتَسَبَتْ

رَبَّنَا لاَ تُؤَاخِذْنَا إِن نَّسِينَا أَوْ أَخْطَأْنَا

رَبَّنَا وَلاَ تَحْمِلْ عَلَيْنَا إِصْرًا كَمَا حَمَلْتَهُ عَلَى الَّذِي مِن قَبْلِنَا

رَبَّنَا وَلاَ تُحَمِّلْنَا مَا لاَ طَاقَةَ لَنَا بِهِ

وَاعْفُ عَنَّا وَاغْفِرْ لَنَا وَارْحَمْنَآ

YUSUF ALI:
On no soul doth Allah Place a burden greater than it can bear. It gets every good that it earns, and it suffers every ill that it earns. (Pray:)
"Our Lord! Condemn us not if we forget or fall into error;
Our Lord! Lay not on us a burden Like that which Thou didst lay on those before us;
Our Lord! Lay not on us a burden greater than we have strength to bear.
Blot out our sins, and grant us forgiveness.
Have mercy on us."

Allah tidak membebani seseorang melainkan sesuai dengan kesanggupannya. Ia mendapat pahala (dari kebajikan) yang diusahakannya dan ia mendapat siksa (dari kejahatan) yang dikerjakannya. (Mereka berdo`a):

"Ya Tuhan kami, janganlah Engkau hukum kami jika kami lupa atau kami tersalah.

Ya Tuhan kami, janganlah Engkau bebankan kepada kami beban yang berat sebagaimana Engkau bebankan kepada orang-orang yang sebelum kami.

Ya Tuhan kami, janganlah Engkau pikulkan kepada kami apa yang tak sanggup kami memikulnya.

Beri maaflah kami; ampunilah kami; dan rahmatilah kami"

***************************************************************

BP1 - 23 MEI 2009 : SABTU PAGI DI RUMAH

I had a tough time to sleep last night. It was already way past 2am... everyone was already asleep, maybe with smiles on their faces. Amzar belanja tengok Night At The Museum (Part II) with popcorns & all. Kononnya before his start of 'serious life as post-SPM student' after 'menganggur' for 3 months. He said PLKN was enjoyable & not really serious...

I had this discomfort on the right side of my head & there was a nagging pain in the inner right ear & neck area underneath the earlobe.
The pain in the ear was already noticeable on Thursday night to a point that I asked Kak Ijah who wanted to have a chat with me to call me using the home phone because I told her that my ear for what ever reason was being extra sensitive to my handphone. I know the conversation was going to be a rather long one since we were trying to figure out what to get as ole-ole for Pak Ripin to bring to Tual. He's leaving on a 1noon Air Asia flight to Jakarta on Friday before moving on to Tual, Sulawesi.

Back to my problem of sleeping, I figured it must be part of this viral flu-like problem I was having.. pain at the back of neck, fatigue, the works...
I had been fighting it off with alternatives, eg horseradish & garlic, multivitamin, etc.
I wanted to take a few days leave but I had a few things to settle (my hutang I called them) since I had pushed almost everything to the side to get the exam matters settled. My last paper (Diseases of the Nervous Sustem) was on the LAST session of the the whole exam period!
So, I dragged myself to work.
On Wednesday, though, my medication for BP had finished & so I saw the panel doctor, Dr Selva. Other than the Atacand, he only gave me something for the body-ache, difflam, nasal spray for my malaise. I was also given an mc but I already brought along a bagful of MQF files to work on, so... I stayed on till late.

Anyway, I thought, ok... tomorrow (Saturday), I would see Dr Selva again & get something for the pain in the ear.

I didn't know when I ended up sleeping.
Next thing I know, it was time for solat subuh.
Then... the shock came when I wanted to wash my face for wudu'. The water hit my right eye. Adoi, pedih! I splashed the water again to the face & it happened again!
I could not figure out what actually happened.
Then, I looked in the mirror above the sink & I realized that my right eye could not be closed.
Oh... I thought, "Bila kita basuh muka... mata automatically tutup rupanya. Huh, interesting!" Something that I took for granted all this time! This morning, only the left eye closed itself to avoid the water.

I still didn't realize what was happening & I continued on with the wudu'.
When I berkumur, then I know something was REALLY SERIOUSLY WRONG.
I couldn't contain the water in my mouth, instead some came out through the right side of my mouth which could not be closed.
I looked up to the mirror & I thought to myself:
- OH MY GOD, DID I HAVE A STROKE LAST NIGHT?
- DID I FORGET TO TAKE MY MEDICATION FOR MY BP?
- THIS IS SO WEIRD... AM I GOING TO BE AN EXAMPLE FOR MY DISEASES OF THE NERVOUS SYSTEM COURSE? Adoi...

I tried pushing all these thoughts aside & quickly continued on & went ahead with my solat subuh. Prioritize... prioritize... Selesaikan yang wajib dulu.
Another thing I realized was that when we did our sujud our eyes would also close!
This morning, my right eye was brushing against the normal thickness sejadah & that hurt a bit.
So, I kept using my right hand to close the right eye & I figured all these extra movements I was making kira daruratlah... Wasn't sure the state of khusyuk-ness of my solat subuh this morning.

I then got myself ready to ask Suami to send me to the hospital, but he was out jogging at the nearby park.

All the time, I was thinking to myself, "Shall I go to PMC where I can remain anonymous or to UMMC & take the chance of bumping into people I know?" Then, logic took over, "You know this is serious. It won't be solved so easily & quickly. It has to be UMMC!"

Suami came back from jogging at the nearby park... & I told him, "I think you have to send me to UMMC... maybe I had a mini stroke, look at my face..."

While he was getting ready, I remembered about my offer to Rahil to babysit Ayrah (who was also supposed to be sick) 8am till 1noon (before going to a wedding reception of a family friend in Putra Jaya).
It was already 7.40am... they were still not here.

I tried calling Rahil. Since she was also sick yesterday, I was partly hoping that she was on mc & so would not be going to work. I wasn't sure that Tini could handle a feverish Ayrah. No answer.

OK, next I called Abang Em's house enquiring whether Ayrah was supposed to go there in as few words as possible. Abang Em gave a lengthy answer about Kak Hana having to go to a PIBG meeting, i.e. Ayrah would not be send oer to Jalan Penchala.

One last attempt, I thought...sent an sms to Rahil (cc-ed to Pak Fozi @ Tok Pa) asking her about her plans.
It was already 8.20am & I told Suami, probably they were not coming.
Then, Ayrah's grandfather replied with an sms saying that NekMa was already in VA, to the rescue :) Phew...

Off we went... Both of us knew that we should get me to UMMC ASAP.

Oops... not before I went upstairs & planted kisses on Durrah, Aiman & Amzar who had gone back to sleep after solat subuh.
Felt a bit like crying, since I sincerely didn't know what to expect once I sent my body to UMMC... whether I would come back to the house today & be able to send Amzar who was supposed to register for his UIA Law matriculation tomorrow.

Manusia merancang... ALLAH menentukan

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